Timeless Advice for a Peaceful Life

So I wrote this piece way back to start 2010 and now over 6 years later, I find it as useful now as it was then. So I’m sharing it here for you fine folks, I hope you enjoy!
Drop me a comment at the end!

So ok 2010 is here, SO WHAT? What does it mean? Well as with the rising of the sun on each new day, it means the chance for a fresh start. This year is for the fulfillment of BIG DREAMS, not everyone will live or have lived to see this new year……

so shouldn’t we be glad that we have this opportunity to live the life we want to live? These are our best years or so everyone keeps telling us but it won’t be unless we make it…..

2009 was not really the best year or my life but it was the year of the most personal GROWTH. If it’s one thing I learned from 2009, it’s that all those stupid sounding clichés are founded on probably the greatest life lesson there is……


But let’s be honest, the happiest times you’ve had in your life, were u ever thinking about the past or the future? I’m sure u weren’t cause I know when I look back on my happiest memories I sure as hell was not thinking about anything but that moment.

If you haven’t seen THE PURSUIT OF HAPPYNESS then u need to buy the DVD or something because its amazing how that story inspires me….

the guy was destitute, no money, a kid to look after, no home to sleep in, but he still went to the internship that he begged for that paid NO money and worked his ASS off putting up with an intolerable boss……..

Y?……because he had a dream and he knew he had to work to get it and there is no better day than TODAY………that’s right this very moment could be the start of the rest of your life………….

ATTITUDE IS EVERYTHING….sounds familiar?…..it’s been said before…… many times………let me give u an example………

I HATE washing wares………like HATE it ……….but then one day I just went over and washed them….nobody was pressing me to wash them and it didn’t thrill me to wash them but they had to be washed……..

I realized a little later that even when someone has the power to make u do something even if u don’t really want to do it, if u do it willingly or at least accept that you have to do it and one day you’ll not have to follow commands it will be smooth and easy…….

now don’t get me wrong ……I don’t mean be a pushover, au contraire, stand up for yourself and your dreams but when u know something has to happen, no matter how unpleasant, if it has to happen, if you have to do it before you can do what you want to do, as long as it’s legal, JUST DO IT!……..I’m sure NIKE knew how profound their slogan was….lol……..but even if u don’t have to do it, if it won’t hurt anyone then why not just do it WILLINGLY.

WILLINGLY……………for a long time (when I was younger of course) I saw that word in the Bible, I’m not sure which passage but I saw it, and for a long time I could not grasp the concept, but this past year I finally understand completely what it means……….

It goes back to attitude and is the best thing I could have realized in my life….so all u folks out there with bad attitudes……..your life will never look up until you perk up……hahahaha doesn’t that sound grand!

So now that I’ve covered that there is one more thing I’d like to leave you all with…. A CLEAN MIND AND A PURE HEART……….whoa! What girl ………….when u get so spiritual…..hahaha I always was but we’ll discuss that later……….

You know when people say if u take your prayers to god with a clean mind and a pure heart your prayers would be answered….did u know that its true?……..

Well you don’t always get what u want but you will realize that what you think you want is not really what you need or what’s best for you……..that’s when you’ll find a spiritual peacefulness or contentment with life……….

When u can look into your own body, mind and soul and listen carefully and harmonize with them……………that’s when you would know what you need and that’s when you’ll realize that you’ll always have exactly what you want……….because you’ll have peace of mind…….. and actually that’s the only thing we all really want……………PEACE OF MIND!

Well that leaves only now my wishes for everyone for this new year and beyond…….A GREAT ATTITUDE…………..GREAT HEALTH………..A CLEAN MIND……A PURE HEART………..CONTINUED SELF IMPROVEMENT……….SUCCESS IN LIFE AND LOVE……….FINANCIAL STABILITY…………..HAPPYNESS

………… AND …… PEACE OF MIND!!!

Happy 2010!!!

Happy Life!

Shoulders Back!

Chin up!

Chest Out!



~~~Ms Abby Kay~~~

How passionate are you ?

I started reading a book called fight for your dream. In the book you are encouraged to discover yourself and your passion. Now while this activity isn’t new to me, I decided to try and actually answer each question.

With each question and the introspection required to answer it, I find myself consumed with emotion. Emotions because I want it so bad because I think about not having gotten there yet and not seeing a clear path to get there it yet I’m absolutely convinced that I must get it, that my spirit will never find true peace without it.

The first time I felt such passion for a dream, it scared me. It scared me because I know that there is no way that I could just get it…. Life doesn’t work like that, life tests you…. And trying to achieve a dream is one of its biggest tests. Things happen that threaten to destroy your spirit, it threatens to destroy your beliefs and your resolve. It is how we face these threats that ultimately decides if we are worthy of not just achieving our dreams but holding on to it.

Now there are many things that can keep us back from what we desire, maybe it wasn’t meant for us, maybe we didn’t want it as badly as we thought, maybe we meet an untimely death, maybe our desires change with time and experiences. But how will we feel if what we want is denied to us because of us?

This is why I ask HOW PASSIONATE ARE YOU? Are you willing to face the challenges, fight the odds, dedicate the time effort and energy it requires? Are you willing to face your family and friends trying to encourage you to do something more ‘practical’?

Most importantly, are you willing to fight yourself for your dreams? Face your inner demons? Stifle your doubts? Wrestle with your fears? Go to war with your weaknesses?

Are you willing to take the time to nourish your strengths or grow your mind? Are you willing to set aside your ego and arrogance to empty yourself of what you think you know to become what you need to become?

This book I mentioned earlier highlighted my greatest fear. It said you need to find out what your next dream will be otherwise you are sentencing yourself to a life of mediocrity.

Living a mediocre life terrifies me because MEDIOCRITY IS THE DEATH OF GREATNESS!

So how passionate are you? Are you going to live each day filled with passion and pursuing your dreams or are you going to be just another walking dead?

You know my words…
Chin up
Chest out


~~~Ms Abby Kay ~~~

Journey to the 1% – Motivation Lacking!!

We’re on our journey to the 1%, it is our quest to be among the world’s most wealthiest.

Stop. Scratch that.

Is being among the world’s wealthiest really important??

Can’t I just get married, have babies and hope to be able to afford food and a great quality of life?

Shouldn’t I just strive to be HAPPY???

When the going gets tough, I start to think like that………..I just want to make love to life!!!

So not every day is a focused, goal driven day………let’s just try to keep these bad days to a minimum people.

Mediocrity is comfortable and when we get comfortable; we get complacent; and complacency is the death of greatness.

Remember that and NEVER get complacent. You were meant to be GREAT!!!

Promiscuous Girl; Virtuous Woman

This one goes out to the ladies!

You’ve had a few sexual partners before and enjoy your share of sexual relations, this immediately disqualifies you from being considered wife material.

What the hell is up with that. So now because you find sex is fun and don’t deprive yourself of partaking in it you almost automatically get labelled. A ‘hoe’ or ‘bad ting’ or some other derogatory term.

If men can see your sexuality and can easily assume that you enjoy and revel in it, then you get treated with less respect than a perceived virgin. WHY?? Why are you not considered wife material because the world views you as a sensual person? The first thing that comes to mind when thinking about what a wife should be is the Bible passage (see below).

Proverbs 31:10-31King James Version (KJV)

Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies. The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.

She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands. She is like the merchants’ ships; she bringeth her food from afar. She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens. She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.

She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms. She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night. She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff.

She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy. She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet. She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple.

Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land. She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant. Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.

She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness. She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness. Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.

Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all. Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised. Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.

Now, does anywhere in that passage read…..she must have been a virgin to be considered virtuous. Sure, don’t ‘horn’ your husband, and yes, ideally we should strive to preserve our hidden treasure for that special person.

BUT, it does not mean that those who have ‘sinned’ and have shared that part of themselves with others to partake in the pleasures of the skin cannot be considered for the virtuous institution of marriage. Many women who have not yet found their Boaz are fulfilling a basic human need (SEX in case you’re wondering) while waiting on this Mr Right.

Why would God give a woman a clitoris filled with nerve endings, so that she can enjoy sex if she wasn’t supposed to enjoy it. Waiting on Mr Right can take forever, sometimes a woman may find herself fooled by pretenders. A woman can be industrious, generous, loving and virtuous and still enjoy her sensual side.

YES…..sometimes a Promiscuous Girl CAN be a Virtuous Woman.

What’s your take? Let’s Debate!!

Journey to the 1% – Defying Mediocrity

A daily prompt inspired what will now be my weekly feature “Journey to the 1%”. This feature will be posted every Saturday and will focus on getting to the 1% status in life.

The 1% are the world’s richest and elitist. The real A-listers. Now my aim is not to get there for riches or fame, but because I genuinely believe that I was made for it. I believe I was made to run a multi-national conglomerate, travel the world and be blissfully happy. Now I may never end up in the world’s 1% but I definitely intend to be in Trinidad’s 1% by the time I’m 40 (I’m currently 26 and just in the lower middle class). My goals may seem far fetched but limitations exist only in our minds.

Now I’m told that we’re the average of the five people we spend the most time with, well whoever said that must not have heard about me. Don’t get me wrong, I do believe that birds of a feather flock together but when you don’t have anyone around you who has achieved what you want to achieve for yourself, and its not because you just don’t fit in with them but because those people literally don’t exist where you are in your life at the moment. Well then you can say that means you weren’t meant to be in the 1%, what if instead you have many around you who will probably end up there or close to it in the future.

Ok, I know its sounds like I don’t believe the whole circle of five theory but I can see how they came up with it. I need only look at my circle and I could see that I am in fact a little bit of each of them.

HOWEVER, while I may be the average of the personalities, I will never succumb to having achieved the average of their success. I love my circle, however, the success I have planned for myself exceeds what they aim for, so I may find myself spending more time with different people but the best times I invest I believe will always be with these few. My circle’s ambition levels may be low for my liking but I will defy mediocrity.

Look for me in the 1%

Breathe, Stretch, Shake …..LET IT GO!!

At work on a saturday……………..inhale, exhale

Feeling lonely / horny and ex having a time……….pump up song tunes

One week into the month and money done………yoga time

Sprained ankle, have to hop to get into the car to get home………..hop to a beat

Kids being pests………..ship them off to grandma’s

The sun is still shining, and you are still living so there is still time for things to go right for you.

Chin up, Chest out………Be Awesome

Introducing: Ms Abby Kay ~ A woman in transition

When you have to be everything, something may slip from your grasp. You become what the old people call, A Jack of All Trades (Master of None). Well I’m here trying to defy the odds. I’m based in Trinidad and Tobago (that’s in the Caribbean for those of you who don’t know). I love life, I love my life. It’s filled with struggles but it is also blessed. I consider it my responsibility to speak up on important issues and I am very opinionated.

Ms Abby Kay is the successful alter ego I created for myself since I was about 5 years old. When I played ‘shop’ or ‘school’ or anything really, I was always Ms Abby Kay. Ms Abby Kay is the side of me that WILL be successful, the business woman, the academic, the mother, the lover, the daughter, the sister, the friend. She epitomizes the many facets associated with the ideal woman. She is the me that I strive to be. All the parts of me that I love and all the parts of me that I am correcting, she is my guiding light. The voice of this blog is the voice of the transition of a girl becoming a woman, of a woman becoming a better woman. This blog is Ms Abby Kay coming to the fore, blooming and weathering the storm.

Why Blog Publicly and not keep a Private Journal?

Sometimes you need to shout from the rooftop. Not because you need people to hear what you’re saying but because you just really need to shout. Sometimes however you do need people to hear what you are saying. Either way, writing this blog is my metaphorical shout from the roof top, plus blogging is more socially acceptably and Ms Abby Kay is a lady.

What topics will I write about?

On being AWESOME!!! Life, Theater, Etiquette,  Love, Work, Inspirations, Sport, Politics. Anything and Everything.

Who would I like to connect with?

Anyone trying to reach a goal, trying to defy the odds. Anyone who enjoys life, who wants to maximize their days and improve the quality of their life.

Within the year what would I like to accomplish by this blog?

To see some personal growth, to have been able to help others achieve personal growth or to just open the eyes of anyone reading to the many different facets of life that they may be missing out on.

Why read what I blog about?

Because I may need you, the reader, along my journey to becoming a greater, better more successful person. Because you may need me, so you don’t feel alone in your everyday struggle. Because it may have important information for you to read or share. Because you just may find it enjoyable.

So I’m open to meeting hearing from the readers and if you want an opinion on something or have an opinion you want to share, just comment. It will be read.

Until next time.

Chin up; Chest out; BE AWESOME


Ms Abby Kay